Ask A Man 15 April

Ask a Man 14 April '25: 'My partner is financially irresponsible.'

Anonymous says she’s known her husband for 8 years and they’ve been married for 6 of those years. Anonymous says her relationship with her partner is toxic and says the biggest issue is finances.  Anonymous says she earns more than her partner and says he also doesn’t contribute much to their household finances. Anonymous says she feels like she has been financially and verbally abusive towards her partner, calling him useless for not taking care their family.  Anonymous says it’s not that he earns less, it’s that he doesn’t spend much money on their family, and has instead accumulated a lot of debt.  Anonymous says she feels like she needs to end the relationship but her heart won’t let go and she can’t financially afford to leave the relationship right now.

Ask a Man 11 April '25: 'My partner found nudes of my and I on my phone.'

Anonymous says her partner recently went through her phone and found nude pictures of her with her ex on her phone.  Anonymous says her partner was upset after finding the pictures, which were recently sent by her ex. Anonymous says her partner also saw a message where she suggested to her ex that they have a threesome.  Anonymous says they went to therapy to try and resolve this issue, however, in a recent incident, her partner tried to call her but he got upset when he couldn’t reach anonymous because he just imagined that anonymous was busy with the ex.  Anonymous says her partner has been deeply affected by this and seems to be pulling away from her. Anonymous says she’s serious about him and doesn’t know how they can move forward from this. 

Ask a Man 9 April '25: 'My partner has been great but i've just found out she's married.'

Anonymous says he has been dating his partner for about 3 years now and says she has been very supportive of him from the time they started dating as he had just graduated.  Anonymous says he got into the e-hailing business and when he decided to start driving his own car, she helped him get the car and they agreed that he would pay her back for the car and they would change the ownership of the car to his name later.  Anonymous says he has since got two more cars on his own but when he tried to change the ownership of the first car from his partner’s name to his own name, she was avoiding doing this, which led to him checking the details of the car, and that’s when he found out that the car is owned by his partner’s husband, and he had no idea that she was even married.  Anonymous is worried about the car situation but he’s also not comfortable with continuing the relationship with his partner knowing that she’s married.

Ask a Man 10 April '25: 'Obsessed with my toxic partner.'

Anonymous says he met a guy last year and they’ve been dating since then. Anonymous says everything was fine until the guy started acting strange.   Anonymous says they once had a conflict & as they were in middle of the fight his partner decided he was leaving, and some other guy came to pick up his partner and they left anonymous at his place.  Anonymous says he tracked his partner on his phone and noticed that his partner went to the other guy’s place. Anonymous also says he found pictures of his partner with that guy looking cozy on the beach.  Anonymous says they met up days later and he confronted his partner about this. Anonymous says his partner was ignoring him, focusing on his phone and this led to them getting into a physical fight.  Anonymous says his partner pressed assault charges against him and he ended up in jail for weeks, before his partner dropped the charges.  Anonymous says his partner reached out to him and they’ve rekindled their relationship. Anonymous says it seems his partner is still hooking up with other people, but despite this he is struggling to let him go. 

Ask a Man 08 April '25: 'He doesn't like when I bring up his cheating.'

Anonymous says she’s been with her partner for two years but says they’ve had an issue with infidelity in their relationship since the very beginning. Anonymous says she’s always finding texts on his phone of him chatting with other girls and flirting with them. She says she’s confronted him about this several times, but it keeps happening.  Anonymous says in the middle of all of this he doesn’t want her to chat with other guys. Anonymous says there’s also a particular girl who he can’t seem to let go of.  Anonymous says he is now accusing her of bringing up the past every time she brings up what he did with those other girls.

Ask a Man 07 April '25: 'Caught between a scammer & a ghoster'

Anonymous says she met a guy no.1 in January and things quickly sparked between them, and the guy moved into her place soon after they started dating.  Anonymous says the guy lies a lot, for starters, he lied about his age, saying he’s in his early thirties but it turned out he’s actually in his early twenties. Anonymous says though he seemed to have a proper job she’s also realised that he might be scamming people on social media.  Anonymous says guy no.2 is someone she was with before guy no.1, she says he’s trying to get back into her life even though he had ghosted her when they dated previously. Anonymous says guy no.2 has seemingly changed and there could be a chance to rekindle things with him.

Ask a Man 04 April '25: 'Why is he still following his ex?'

Anonymous says she’s been with her partner for two years, they live together, their families know about each other, and their relationship is moving in the marriage direction.  Anonymous says she recently had a dream that there is something funny happening in their relationship, after this, anonymous says she looked through his phone and found that he’s still following his ex on Tik Tok and has liked all 11 of her posts.  Anonymous says they already had a fight about him following his ex on social media and she thought this was resolved. Anonymous says she’s now confused on how to feel about this.

Ask a Man 03 April '25: 'I want to marry her but her family is a problem.'

Anonymous says he met his current partner 8 years ago, after being single for 3 years. Anonymous says they started dating soon after meeting.  Anonymous says his partner came into their relationship with two children and they have since had four more children together, she is currently pregnant with twins.  Anonymous says that the problem in their relationship seems to be his partner’s family as they tend to meddle into their relationship. Anonymous says currently he’s trying to get married to his partner but there are some wranglings regarding the lobola amount anonymous must pay…

Ask A Man 02 April '25: He's not ready to be a family man.'

Anonymous says she’s a mother of two and she broke up with the father of her children back in 2015. Anonymous says she met another guy shortly after this but the relationship failed because she didn’t want the guy to meet her kids as they were young.  Anonymous says she waited for her kids to grow before dating again and she’s now in a relationship with someone who she has introduced to her kids and they’ve been together for a while now, but anonymous says she feels like he’s closed off and doesn’t share his true feelings. Anonymous says she feels like he’s not emotionally mature enough to be a family man, as he also has a terrible relationship with his own family.  Anonymous says even though he’d like to have a child with her, she’s also realised that he’s lacking when it comes to having paternal instincts.

Ask A Man 1 Apr '25: 'Did I push him to cheat on me?'

Anonymous says she’s been with her partner for a year and after he lost his job last November, the partner moved back to his home town.  Anonymous says after their relationship became long distant, they began to struggle with communication and anonymous says she ended up pushing him away, as she was hiding somethings from him.  Anonymous says this caused a rift between them and he ended having a relationship with someone else and impregnating that person. Anonymous says the guy has told her that he does love the girl he’s impregnated, adding that he’d like to date both anonymous and the other girl.  Anonymous doesn’t know what to do.

Ask A Man 31 Mar '25: 'My children miss their home, should I get back together with him?'

Anonymous says she’s been with her husband for 17 years since they were in high school and they’ve been married for about 8 years.  Anonymous says post high school she studied further, got her qualifications and has been financially stable since then, on the other hand she says her husband lacks ambition and hasn’t worked much this whole time that they’ve been together, which means she’s been supporting their household, which now includes two children as well.  Anonymous says she eventually broke things off with him as things got toxic in their home but eventually got back together with him. Anonymous says their relationship never really got better and describes her husband as being emotionally and financially abusive…

Ask a Man 28 Mar '25: 'Why can't I get over my side?'

Anonymous says she’s been in a relationship with her partner for 3 years and says their relationship couldn’t be better, however, anonymous says she started cheating on her partner, with someone who lives on the same street as her mother.  Anonymous says she then found out that her side piece was cheating on her and they broke things off. Anonymous says even though things are great with her partner, she finds herself hurt by what happened with her side piece and she’s struggling to let her go.  Anonymous says she is really happy with her partner and doesn’t want to leave her.

Ask a Man 27 Mar '25: 'Caught between choosing my friend or his ex.'

Anonymous says his friend broke up with his partner 2 months ago, after the break up, anonymous says he started chatting with his partner’s ex and they hit things off.  Anonymous says things quickly got serious between him and his friend’s ex and that’s when he decided to tell his friend that he’d like to his ex. Anonymous says his friend told him he doesn’t approve of this relationship and their friendship would be over if anonymous continued to date his ex.  Anonymous says they have slept with each other’s flings in the past, so he thought his friend would be ok with this.  Anonymous says he’s not sure who to choose, as he’s in love with his friend’s ex but also finds some value in his friendship, as they are a part of a group of friends.

Ask a Man 26 Mar '25: 'Things changed after I moved close to him.'

Anonymous says she’s been with her partner for just over a year now and they’ve known each other for about 10 years altogether.  Anonymous says they were initially in a long-distance relationship and things were great but his behaviour changed when she moved to the same area as him.  Anonymous says she feels like even though she’s goegraphically closer now, he doesn’t pay much attention to her, shows little support and hardly initiates conversations with her.  Anonymous says they don’t even talk much now and she doesn’t know what to do.

Ask a Man 25 Mar '25: 'How to tell my partner I impregnated my side.'

Ask a Man 24 Mar '24: 'My partner says I'm using him for money.'

Anonymous says she’s been with her partner for two years and everything was fine between them from the on set but things changed after she became pregnant.  Anonymous says after finding out about the pregnancy they moved in together but his character changed and they started fighting a lot, to a point that he moved out of their place.  Anonymous says most recently he asked him for money to do a pregnancy scan but this turned into a fight and her partner accused her of using him for his money, saying anonymous doesn’t even care about his kids.  Anonymous says she doesn’t know where that is coming from as she’s never relied on him financially and in fact he was unemployed when they started dating.

Ask a Man 20 March '25: 'In love with someone I've never met.'

Anonymous says mid last year she found a lady on social media who she liked but only DM’d her earlier this in January and confessed her feelings.  Anonymous says it turned out the lady also liked her and so they started dating online, as they’ve never met. Anonymous says their relationship was going well until Anonymous wasn’t in a good mood one day and took those emotions out on the lady.  Anonymous says things weren’t the same since that day, and the lady eventually broke things off with her. Anonymous doesn’t know what to do as she loves this lady a lot!

Ask a Man - 19 March '25: 'My partner is too controlling.'

Anonymous says she met guy no.1 last year at her new church after moving to a new province. Anonymous says they started dating shortly after their first interaction.  Anonymous says things were good between them until she went back home to visit and says when she came back to her new area she realised that his energy had changed, and upon searching on his phone, she found that he was still chatting to and spending time with  other girls.  Anonymous confronted him about this and he explained that he did already have thing with one of the girls while they started with their thing…

Ask A Man 18 March '25: 'My partner is in love with me but I'm not sure.'

Anonymous says she’s been with her current partner for 5 years and says he’s a great partner and takes care of her, and he’s even paid lobola for her.  Anonymous says her problem is she feels a void in her relationship, and says there’s no spark and passion, it’s just boring. Anonymous says she likes him but doesn’t think he’s the one.  Anonymous says one of the issues in their relationship is that they don’t have a good communication.  Anonymous is not sure if she should fight for the relationship or just break up with him.